January 2012
4 posts
2012: A Year in Review
Boy, 2012. What a year, huh? Especially if you like Jesus and football. Or (in the case of Tim Tebow) both, which is probably why he’s been a thing so far this year. We’re half way through January, so I thought I’d give my way-too-early Year in Review.
Politics
Friday night on Real Time with Bill Maher, they touched on the fact that front-runner, Mitt Romney, is hard to...
We Should Be Happy It's 2012
This story is a few weeks old, but I’ve been cleaning up my RSS feed and I read that Barbara Walters’ 10 Most Fascinating People of 2011 special was down 30% in viewers from the previous year. Then I looked up who the fascinating people were. The Kardashians, Jesse Tyler Ferguson and Eric Stonestreet, Simon Cowell, Donald Trump, Derek Jeter, Katy Perry, Pippa Middleton, Herman...
December 2011
4 posts
Observations From 20 Years of Iowa Life
You know what’s fun? Coming back to Iowa just in time for a University of Iowa journalism professor to write an article in The Atlantic about how shitty and backwards the state is. The article was written by Stephen G. Bloom, whom I knew as the author of Postville: A Clash of Cultures in Heartland America - a book where he pretends Hasidic Judaism ISN’T super fucking weird. The reason for...
Coming Soon to iTunes. The Best of the Gentlemen...
The Gentlemen Scumbags are coming out with a best of album that’ll be on iTunes very soon. It features Matt Braunger, Kyle Kinane, Sean Patton, Rory Scovel, James Adomian, Pete Holmes and a ton of our other scummy friends. Here’s a full track listing, which will is hosted by Mike Burns and me, as well as our producer, the hilarious Patrick Melton…
1. Chub O’Rama...
Baseball Nerd Talk: Ron Santo, the 19th Century...
I’ve heard enough Cubs fans gripe about Ron Santo posthumously getting into the Hall of Fame this year, that I wanted to address it. Yes, it sucks that he didn’t get to live long enough see his induction. Yes, his speech would have been amazing. But isn’t it obvious that Santo’s death was the reason he finally got inducted in the first place? That’s not just me...
The Best Songs of 2011
First things first - I’m not very cool. At all. And I’ve accepted that. I don’t look cool. I don’t say cool things. I actually racked my brain to think of one cool thing about myself and came up empty. On the other hand, thinking of uncool things was really easy.
- Last night I talked shit to a professional wrestler from the stage at a comedy show because I wanted...
October 2011
10 posts
Rob Delaney: I got an email forward from my dad... →
Subject: Democracy In Action
Warren Buffett, in a recent interview with CNBC, offers one of the best quotes about the debt ceiling: ”I could end the deficit in 5 minutes,” he told CNBC. “You just pass a law that says that anytime there is a deficit of more than 3% of GDP,…
I like when people get excited about politics and whatnot, but this isn’t a real thing.
...
New Gentlemen Scumbags with John Roy →
I only got 2 things out of that Brewers game.
Here’s a new video for TJ Miller’s song, “Now We’re Partying.” I’m in it lookin’ fresh.
September 2011
15 posts
Picking on 2 of my college roommates from the stage in Chicago.
Mike Burns on NLO. @gentscum, @nlo, @pmelt,... →
I Care Too Much About College Football (Week 3)
Hey, it’s week 3. Did you see the Iowa-Pitt game? Seriously. Did you see that game? Your loss. Anyway, here’s what happened.
#1 Oklahoma beat #5 Florida State 23-13.
Okay, fine. Both teams are legit. I kinda had a hard time believing it after last year. EJ Manuel got hurt and FSU really doesn’t have a running game. And Landry Jones didn’t have that great of a...
This is the role @Natecraig1 was born to play. Besides this one.
I Like College Football A Little Less (Week Two)
Well, we’re finally all over weather delays and talking about ugly uniforms, but good teams still played horseshit directional schools this week and I learned that Iowa ain’t what she used to be. Here’s week 2.
#2 LSU beat Northwestern State 49-3.
LSU’s defense is too fast. Jarrett Lee and 6-5 222 pound Zach Mettenberger split time at quarterback… you know,...
Boy I sure thought this was funny when I made it. My roommates just looked at me, shook their heads and said, “That’s what you’re doing today?”
I Care Too Much About College Football (Week One)
Hey, the first week of college football is finally over. We still don’t know shit, except that it rained a whole bunch and some top 25 teams got beat, so let’s see what happened…
#1 Oklahoma beat Tulsa 47-14
Oklahoma looked like the #1 team in the nation so far. Unless you want to give it to LSU, but I’ll get to that later. Landry Jones and Ryan Broyles are going to...
August 2011
7 posts
I Care Too Much About College Football (Week One...
Hey, it’s college football season everybody. And I know that pre-season rankings and whatnot are always wrong (for example, Iowa isn’t even ranked - right, everyone?), but last year I got into so many heated arguments that I thought I’d start it all back up this year. Let’s have a look at this week’s games…
#1 Oklahoma vs. Tulsa
So everybody except for...
I'm Classy
My roommate and his girlfriend just came back to the house with a bunch of extra chicken wings from 35 cent wing night, so he gave me some. And I proceeded to get BBQ sauce all over my face and facial hair (which is looking super rockin’, btw).
Instead of cleaning it off, I used the sauce to curl a sweet-ass handlebar mustache for myself and started singing that waterfall song from the...
New Gentlemen Scumbags with Ricky "Flair" Carmona →
July 2011
10 posts
Sorry. I’ve been drinking.
New Gentlemen Scumbags (with Jesse Popp) →
New Gentlemen Scumbags (with Brendan McGowan) →
GQ Interview with CM Punk →
New Gentlemen Scumbags (with Matt Braunger) →